“My name is Tiffany … I’m pansexual and I fall in love with personalities not labels.”
I have lived in Kansas City since the age of 3 years old until now (except 6 years of my life when I moved away for college). At the age of 12 I had an idea I liked girls and not just guys. I did not bother to think deeply about it until the age of 14 when my best friend came out as bisexual. I realized then that I had a crush on her. The other students were pretty accepting of her. So I finally came out. At the time my label was “bisexual”. However, I was not accepted. It turned into a nightmare. Students called me names, laughed at me, pushed me into lockers, put death threats in my locker, wrote horrible things about me in others yearbooks, and said horrible things to my face. It was so bad I was pulled out of school but my mother did not know the true reasoning. She thought it was because I was outspoken.
I was home schooled for a short time. During this time I had no friends. When I returned to school I went to different school district. I remained in the closet while I was there. I only was out to my 2 best friends. Then college came and I became the Vice-President of the Gay-Straight Alliance. Out of fear from what happened to me when I was younger, I only outed myself to a few people. I presented myself as an ally. I finally became tired of not being true to myself and came out again as bisexual because that is what I felt I was at the time. I always knew I was very accepting of everyone no matter what but I did not see that that played into my orientation at that time.
I was still in the closet to my mother. I dated boys to make it easier on myself but had fun with a couple of girls. At the age of 20, I could not resist my urge to be with a girl again so I started dating and started a relationship with a girl that turned into a long-term relationship. This encouraged me to come out to my mother. I was tired of being in the closet. I wanted out and I wanted the world to know. However, due to the high of finally really being with a girl I came out as lesbian. After almost 4 and half years that relationship ended. I debated with myself about what gender I was the most interested in. This was when the truth came out. At the age of 25, just 2 years ago, I finally found out how my acceptance of everyone was part of my orientation. I started dating a girl who started opening up and came out as transgender. Some of my friends were like “I thought you were a lesbian?”, “Are you okay with this?”, “How can you be okay with this and so accepting?”. I embraced it! Not only did my transgender boyfriend realize his true self the experience allowed me to find my true pansexual orientation.
For more information on Pansexuality: stop-homophobia.com/pansexuality.htm